Not so fast...

I thought after yesterday's release that maybe I was on the road to recovery, but tonight I found myself again feeling like I am enclosed in a pressure cooker. It's like my stress hormones are seeping deeper into every cell, every fiber, and I am having a really hard time finding relief. You start to wonder if the Earth's gravitational force has increased...

I taught a soft yoga class tonight, and OH, how I wish I could have participated myself! I was feeling so incredibly stiff after yesterday's workout and driving 7 hours in my car today. So after class, instead of heading for the showers, I drove home and decided to try to do some "P.M. Yoga" for 20 minutes; AND I JUST COULDN'T DO IT. I started off in child's position and tried to breathe. When that didn't help I lay on my back with my legs resting on our easy chair's footrest. I even tested Downward Dog, just to see how my body would respond, and my body's answer was a loud and resounding NO.

So now I have to try to figure out how to proceed. Do I a) just do my practice? b) commit myself to meditation and hope that the incredible challenge of quieting my mind will eventually pass? c) write lists of everything that is stressing me and figure out a plan for how to deal with each issue individually? d) stop fretting and just chill?

Like my girlfriend wrote to me a few days ago; some things you can try, things you know can be good for you, but instead you put if off since you know you will most likely end up feeling worse before you feel better.

Is this what being pre-menopausal feels like?