Jetlag has me up at 1:30 A.M. this January morning. The fireworks from last night have been replaced by a soft blanket of snow, and the silence is only broken by the sound of tangent keys being pressed as I write. Up until now I haven't reflected much about the fact that we have now all entered a new decennium, but with me being a child born in the final breaths of the sixites, I realize that every new, decennial transition marks the next age-oriented phase in my life: the past decennium represented my 30's while the 2010's are going to mark my 40's. When 2019 draws to a close, I will be turning 50.......
OK - no need to get depressed (!); on the contrary I have noticed that for the past couple days I have for some reason felt a sense of warm optimism. I am feeling the same kind of anticipation I felt every year on the first day of school when everything was new from the clothes I wore to the teacher and classmates I would receive; it was just as exciting every year. The past week P and I have discussed (as much as one can when the kids are around constantly demanding our undivided attention 24/7) what changes we may or may not choose to make in our lives. At any rate, we both seem to have come to the realization that time is ticking, and life offers no guarantees. And while we can do our best to make informed decisions, at some point we have to take risks if there ever is going to be a "some day". Maybe it's time for some transformation? or perhaps a change of climate??
I am also curious as to what lies ahead in my career. The past few months I have been reflecting on what route I need to take: the "forward-march" in my career so that we can afford to live the life we desire for us and our children (in the hopes that all desire doesn't have to be o-yogic desire), or is it soon time for me to live more simply so that I can search for more soulful riches?
In one of the books that changed my life, "A Simple Abundance", the author opens by explaining that in the beginning of our journey one is not expected to have any answers; it is however a good time to start asking the questions. Maybe I should be looking back at the year that has past, but for whatever reason I can only look forward from where I am right now at the moment. The slate has been cleaned, and I hope and pray that the 2010's will be the decennium I gravitate even more towards my authentic self.
No comments:
Post a Comment