Being found

Before the start of my class yesterday, one of my students wondered when I started doing yoga. My answer to that is somewhat vague, since it's been a journey without a definite starting point.

I usually admit that I more than a decade ago had gotten a yoga mat along with a VHS-tape as a present from my sister, which I was really happy to receive, but it took me two years to even open them. And when I finally chose to do that, it was because I had no choice; I was pregnant with my daughter and constantly sicker than a dog. I was, however, a workout freak at that time (thank God that's in the past ;-) ) so I felt that I had to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING! So I rolled out my mat and plugged in Sarah Connor's "Joy of Yoga". This was 1998.

I dabbled; then in 2000 we moved to Malmö, and I discovered Body Balance. Some people knock on Body Balance since it's done to music (really great music if you ask me) and is more a kind of Mc Yoga (thanks, Carina, for that expression). For me, however, it was a great side path that eventually led me to the path of yoga.

Side path or not, Body Balance was definitely a paved path to travel along. It craved no reflection, and everything was neatly packaged and spoonfed to me from a silver platter. So after having instructed Body Balance in Kalmar for a couple of years, my dear friend Carina introduced me to Baron Baptiste. Baron and I started up an acquaintance (OK, his recorded image and I had an acquaintance), but Balance was still the backbone of my practice - until I moved to Växjö.

In Växjö they didn't offer Body Balance at any of the gyms. However at one gym they had yoga, and since both of their yoga instructors were pregnant, maybe I could teach yoga? Mind you, I don't feel that watching DVD's and reading books qualifies me to teach, but here I was, at a crossroads: I could either switch tracks and start onto an uncertain, unpaved path or just end my journey right there. So I did the best I could and started doing more yoga with the help of Baron's image, and considering the circumstances it went rather well.

Josephine Selander, my yoga teacher, had been during this time one of the Body Balance team instructors, and I had had the privilege of training for her on a number of occasions. I admired especially her deep knowledge and high demands for good technique. So when I found out that she was starting her own yoga teacher education, I didn't hesitate to sign up.

Since then my yogic path has led me from a dimly lit and winding path to a vast open area, sort of like if you put a meadow, some trees, add a beach and the sea, and whatever else you find appealing, and mix it all together. It's not nearly close to being my final station, and sometimes there are different obstacles to overcome, but all in all I have so much more to choose from now since my yoga has come to mean so much more than just the physical practice.

And the best part of it all is that when I look back, I don't feel that I was the one who found yoga. Honestly, I wasn't even looking for yoga. Yoga found me. And it found me when I needed to be found and was ready for it.